Friday, February 24, 2012

hammerhead vs. dr. atkins

Hammerhead: I got me this bag of Philadelphia cream cheese packets at Costco last night. 50 count! It's my new snack.

Me: Cream cheese? All by itself?

Hammerhead: Yeah. You know how I’m on Atkins? Got no carbs. I eat it like this. (She rips open a packet and squirts it into her mouth.)

Me: Oh. My. God.

Hammerhead: Hey, it doesn't have any sugar so LAY OFF.

(At the end of the day I saw the bag in her trash can with two packets left in it, which means she ate forty-eight packets of cream cheese that day.)


  1. Makes me want to throw up a little in my mouth.

  2. Holy cow why don't you just lay off the lady already.
    It makes you sound like a kook, obsessing over this lady's every move.